Thick and wet, the snow shed off the roof last night, blocking the front door. Yesterday, DaNae and I shoveled off the roof of our old house for the renter. I didn't charge her, adding it to the list of good deeds I've done for you. Remember how you and DaNae begged to shovel that roof, just so you could jump off? Until last year, when I had to beg you to help me. Remember how mad I got?
Today, I'll be shoveling and plowing, again. It's warm and safe inside, and Cholo curls beside me.
Why did you have to die your father's death, son? I tried so hard to save you. Cholo has been depressed. I think he figured his boy would come home for Christmas. I gave him two beef bones. He curls up with Pop the Penguin, the stuffed toy I sleep with.
We haven't been to the mountain, yet. I got DaNae a day pass and we plan on snowboarding next week after the holiday crowd disperses. It won't be the same without you.
About Me
- Desire` Aguirre
- I live in Idaho with four cats, two dogs, and two horses. A free-lance journalist, I write for The River Journal, The Reader, The Sentinel, Sandpoint Magazine and Idaho Magazine. When my son, Niko, died May 8, 2008, I became a member of the worst day club. I returned to complete my senior year at LCSC and studied parental grief for my communications research project. It is my hope that by sharing my experience, strength, and hope with other bereaved parents, I will make sense of my son's death, learn how to live without his smile, and help other's trudge through the grieving process. My son's life gave me the courage to actively pursue my passions, and I learned how to play banjo, guitar, mandolin, fiddle, bodhran, bones, mountain and hammer dulcimer, and now write songs and am a member of the old time string band, "Ruff Shodd." For fun, I also write the blog "Harold the Ghost."
Nik, Desire` and DaNae Aguirre
family reunion, 2007
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