DaNae and I drove wrote Nik a letter and tied them to balloons. We drove up to Schweitzer Mountain and released them. They flew so high. Finally, they disappeared and we headed down the hill and stopped at the crash site. We shared a cup of white mocha latte and left a third of it for Nik, along with a birthday balloon and some flowers.
I made it through the death day and his birthday. I bought him a blue spruce and planted it in the front yard. I moved rocks into the memorial garden and planted some flowers.
It's hard to swallow my anger. His friends go on, drinking and drugging in his name. Didn't anyone learn anything? At times, I hate them for their stupidity, for not taking his keys, for letting him drive that night, for getting to live when he died.
I miss his laugh. I miss his smile. I miss his smell. I cry my tears; I graduated from LCSC; I think about him every single day.
